Saturday; Text to Action

[feelthelightning]

I'm gonna be a little late. Had to run into work on my day off for a bit.

The text was sent at around 5pm and it wasn't exactly a lie. It just had nothing to do with CCPD work. It had to do with stopping a train from derailing. And now he was waiting for a bruise over his left eye to heal before he could show up. Because it would be gone in 30 minutes max and if his bruise disappeared while he was having dinner with her it might seem suspicious.

He was just glad Caitlin and Harry had managed to create an anti venom for the chameleon's venom so quickly or he would have had to call off the date entirely. He still had no leads on who killed the chameleon or what went down in that bar. If he didn't know better, it had been Snart's Cold gun, but he was off with the Legends fixing time. Whatever had done it, made sure the Meta wouldn't get back up.

It was roughly 6:45 when he finally showed up at he place in a dress shirt and waistcoat with matching slacks. He had a bottle of wine in one arm and a bouquet of flowers in the other. He knocked on her apartment door, careful not to drop anything.

Comments

[infinite1ups]

He sounded so earnest in his desire to help her that she actually stopped to think. It was earning some brownie points, of course, and she was happy for any reason to have him around.

"Anything? I mean, I do have this shelf I was gonna hang up in my bedroom but I was kinda struggling with it..." Again she felt her face grow warmer. Her cheeks just might have been as red as her dress. Maybe Snart had a point about her getting hurt a lot. There had been mishaps trying to hang up that stupid shelf.

"Oh, nah. I'm used to it from my dad by now. He's really toned it down, mostly saves it for the big stuff." Like settling down in a new city, then immediately getting wrapped up in a bar fight and meeting a guy. Both had been shared in a phone call with Noah on the night of the fight, and she'd mentioned Barry mostly to cheer herself up. She hadn't shut up about that day at the coffee shop either; her mom had also heard all about it. Claire hadn't breathed a word about Thawne to either of them, nor would she. "I'm looking forward to showing him around - don't worry, Jitters is gonna be one of our first stops."

[feelthelightning]

"Sure!" He jumped on the offer to help with the shelf. "Two sets of hands make tasks like that easier!" Then it dawned on him that she said in her bedroom. He pretty much grew up with Iris after his mother died and dad went to jail, so a girl's bedroom wasn't a foreign space to him. Hell, Joe said Barry was like having another daughter in the house rather than taking in a son. This was different, though. Because he hadn't lived in the same house with her. So the creeping blush grew. "I-I mean if you're sure you want me in your room!"

Barry Allen, you are a mess of a human being. "I can pop by Jitters to say hi when he's in town. I'd love to meet him."

[infinite1ups]

Heaven help her, Barry was adorable. The immediate agreement, followed by the immediate shy realization that she'd invited him into her bedroom. Claire grinned, eyes shining with affection, and reached to squeeze his hand.

"I wouldn't put it out there if I wasn't comfortable with it. But, hey-- I'm not putting you to work on our date. We can totally do it another day."

An excuse to hang out? Absolutely. It wasn't anything vital, definitely something that could wait for later, when they could make time. The pizza would be done any minute, and besides, what kind of monster would she be if she gave him a to-do list on their first proper date?

"Wait. You... actually want to meet my dad?" She'd mentioned that he could be overprotective, usually that scared guys off. Though she had also said she was sure Noah would like him. Still, it only endeared her to him even more. "Okay, I'll let you know when he's here."

[feelthelightning]

Barry gave her hand a squeeze in return. "Another day sounds perfect. That gives me another excuse to visit." He tried to sound confident and flirty, but he was just too giddy to come off ad anything but a twitterpated goof. It should be illegal to be this full of happy fuzzies around someone! His heart was so aflutter, if he wasn't careful he'd end up accidentally pulling himself into Flash Time just because his pulse was beating too fast.

"Are you kidding? Of course I do! I wanna make a good impression. And let him know his daughter will be safe in Central City." His blue-green eyes were determined. He wanted her dad to like him. He'd undergo whatever tests an overprotective father wanted to put him through. "And also, my foster father wants to meet you, too. But that's something that can wait. I think I've been driving Joe up the walls since our little lunch at Jitters."

[infinite1ups]

Another excuse to visit - they were practically on the same wavelength. As much as Claire might try to rein it in, she couldn't stop smiling. She was all but buzzing with excitement, still holding Barry's hand.

Safe. It almost made her smile falter, knowing she'd already been attacked. With that look in his eyes, though, she believed him. How different would things have turned out if he'd been there? Not telling him was starting to feel too much like lying.

"He'll be glad to hear that," she said, ducking her head sheepishly. "Trouble tends to find me even when I'm not looking for it." And then, with a huff of a laugh, "Especially when I'm not looking for it."

Maybe it shouldn't have been, but it was still a surprise to hear that he'd talked her up so much to Joe. After all, she'd talked about Barry just as much to her parents. "I'd love to meet your foster father."

She brought his hand up to kiss the back of it. "He's gotta know you're in good hands."

[feelthelightning]

"He knows I am. I haven't been head over heels for anyone in a long time."

Barry knew first hand how dangerous Central City could be. He was determined not to let her become a target like Linda and Patty had. But something in what she said struck a cord with him. That trouble seemed to find her.

"Did something happen?" He cradled her hand in both of his, holding it close to him after she kissed the back of his. "The Flash was out of commission the last few days. He got poisoned by the same Meta that attacked Harry, which happens to be the one we found dead. I have an SOS app on my phone that buzzes The Flash if something's going down. STAR Labs monitors CCPD's chatter, so he's usually on the scene before the police. But if you ever find yourself in trouble just text or call me an SOS and I can have him there in a second." He'd have to talk to Cisco about getting her an SOS button like the rest of them so it directly linked to STAR Labs. It was more discrete than trying to text or call. Just one push.

[infinite1ups]

Head over heels? She might swear her heart skipped a beat at that. It was obvious they liked each other, and it was becoming clearer just how deep that mutual attraction was going. And fast.

Claire felt herself being drawn in more, her hand cocooned in his, and she leaned a bit closer. She should have known her comment might have seemed suspicious. Now he was asking, and what could she do but tell the truth?

Or, as much of the truth as possible. Snart had all but made her swear not to mention the ship. But as Leonard's friend, maybe Barry already knew. She could leave that part out.

"Well..." Claire bit her lip, suddenly awkward. "The trouble that found me was, uh, that Meta. The chameleon guy." She paused for a deep breath, then quickly added, "I'm fine, though! I'm a lot tougher than I look, and... I had some help, uh, from a friend of yours."

Snart had never told her not to mention him at all, so that was fair game. She still needed to tell him what she was, what she could do. That wasn't something she was trying to intentionally hide. It was just easier this way, piecemeal.

"Guess you can tell The Flash we helped. But, y'know, I'll try to text next time." She hadn't realized Barry was that tight with The Flash, but given how he'd reacted at Jitters, maybe it made sense.

[feelthelightning]

Barry did most things in life fast, including falling in love. It made his heartbreaks that much harder to deal with because he gave everything so freely. Both versions of Wells warned him about being so quick to trust, but it was a lesson he still hadn't learned.

She leaned closer and he scooted a bit close so they were nestled together just slightly. Barry was very affectionate by nature. It drove his more distant friends like Oliver nuts. He wouldn't cross boundaries with someone he barely knew, but she'd initiated the hand holding and seem receptive to touch, so right now snuggle was the comfort he offered now that she seemed awkward. He wanted her to be relaxed around him.

When she spoke, he felt ice run through his veins, though. A surge of panic gripped him as he looked her over the best he could for injuries. A friend of his? "That was Snart's Cold Gun." He muttered, storing that away for later. "You sure you're alright? Claire, I'm so sorry I wasn't there to help!" That damn venom had him confined to bed rest until Harry and Caitlin came up with an antidote. But he should have been there to help! She could have been severely hurt or worse!

But at least she'd had someone there with her. She wasn't alone. And she seemed fine. If she'd been hit, they wouldn't be on this date. The venom proved to be fatal without some kind of healing factor involved.

"Y-yeah, I'll let him know. He'll be relieved to know you had Snart with you to have your back when he couldn't be there." He owed Leonard. He'd have to drop the Legends a personal call so he could thank Cold. He knew the man would shut down his gratitude, but it still needed to be said.

[infinite1ups]

Try as she might to be careful with her feelings, some people just had a way of blowing past her defenses. Thawne had gotten there with flattery, whether he'd intended to or not. But with Barry, it was different. The sparks that first day had been both literal and figurative.

Claire felt entirely comfortable to lean in more, letting her arm rest against his. It just felt natural. Right.

She knew that look, the way his eyes searched her for signs of injury. It made her blush, considering her dress was showing off a little skin. If she'd been injured without healing, it'd be painfully obvious.

"I'm fine, I promise." She looked down again, at his hands wrapped around her own. The truth, now. "It did get me a little, but I heal. I mentioned people like Metas before. People with powers, that aren't Metas. I'm... one of them."

With that, she lifted her eyes to his again, a hint of desperation in the pale green. "I didn't want to hide it from you on purpose. It's just always weird to bring if up and I... I like you a lot. I can't keep it to myself anymore."

Before they get in any deeper, he can decide if she's too weird, too dangerous, to be with. Sure, he said he'd keep her safe, but would he want to get even more mixed up with her when he already had enough going on? She might just get in the way, be a target. Hell, she already was targeted. He could choose to keep his distance from her if he felt that was best - it was only fair that he could make an informed decision.

Better now before it hurt even more later.

[feelthelightning]

Barry shifted so he could fold his leg half up onto the couch, which would allow him to turn and face her better, rather than being side by side. He studied her features as she spoke. His own were guarded for probably the first time since they'd met. He tentatively let go of her hand, but not to let her worry that he was pulling away, he placed his hands on her upper arms lightly.

"It hurt you?" The concern there was palpable. "If it scratched you, the venom could still be in your system. We have a cure at STAR Labs." Leave it to Barry to be more worried about her health than fussed with the idea that she was something other than Meta or plane Jane human.

"Have you been having trouble breathing or your limbs feeling a little bit like pins and needles but not fully numb? Or moving slower than normal? Your pulse a little thready?" All spoken from experience.

He was about one 'yes' away from Flash Time turning off the oven and running her at full speed back to the lab for a dose of the anti venom. He'd already reached for the Speed Force with the hike in his adrenaline. If she was observant enough, she might see faint crackles of yellow lightning dancing around his irises. But only if she was looking him in the eyes.

[infinite1ups]

She shifted to face him a little more, hands in her lap. His hands were warm on her skin, her arms bare in the dress with its thin straps. There was a heaviness in her chest at how worried he sounded, and worrying about how best to explain tore at her.

"My regeneration healed the wounds, and I think it fought off the worst of the venom's effects. It did much worse to Leonard, I had to drag him in--" Claire stopped short, blushing. "He, uh. He didn't want me to tell. Let's just say he and I are even when it comes to saving one another's lives." Since Barry knew that Snart had been there, she hoped he could put it together on his own. If he knew about the ship already, it wasn't really revealing a secret. Yeah, it was kind of a loophole, but it was the best she could do to honor Snart's wishes, and she owed him at least that much.

The look in Barry's eyes was intense, it almost startled her how they just barely seemed to crackle and glow. Yellow, somehow similar to the red she'd seen with Thawne...

That couldn't be a coincidence, could it? She wasn't going to worry about it now, not when he was so worried about her. Not to mention, Thawne was a secret she had to keep even more closely guarded than her time aboard the Waverider.

"I'm still kind of freaked out about it, if I'm honest. It was scary - I've never really experienced anything like that before. Physically, though, I'm all better." He likely had no idea what a testament it was to how much she really liked him if she was admitting that she was scared. She lifted a hand to gently touch his cheek and offered what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "Takes a lot more than that to keep me down."

[feelthelightning]

It would, of course, do much worse to Leonard. As formidable as Snart was, he wasn't a Meta. So, like Harry, the venom would've hit him hard. The fact that she wasn't telling him that Snart was dead meant that Gideon had a remedy for him, which was probably what she was dancing around saying. The tension in his shoulders eased up some and he let his hands slide down her arms some to rest just above her elbows. The dim crackles in his eyes died down as he let go of the Speed Force.

"I'm glad you were there for him, too. Thanks for saving him. He's a decent guy, deep down." Barry insisted, looking her over with a softer gaze this time. More just taking in her features. But as soon as she started talking about being freaked out, he pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight.

"Hey, it's okay. We all get freaked out. You said you're not a Meta. Do you wanna talk about it or not? If getting it off your chest will help calm that panic, I've been told I'm a great listener. If it won't, I'm also a great cuddler. We can just cuddle, and I can hold you until you're less freaked."

[infinite1ups]

Claire didn't love admitting weakness, but maybe with Barry it wasn't so bad. He did give excellent hugs, after all. She snuggled in close, arms slipping around his middle, head dropping to his shoulder with a content sigh.

Yeah, she could get used to this.

"He saved my butt out there, he's got my stamp of approval," she chuckled softly, then turned more thoughtful. "When he saw me heal, he said I should tell you. That you needed to know, and you'd understand. Or... you might slip through my fingers."

Even as she'd already been planning to tell Barry, those words had continued to be heavy motivation to do it sooner rather than later. Yet still there was the fear that had always come with telling anyone she cared for about it. He was handling it far better than most.

It was hard to be upset about anything with his arms around her.

"Talking about what I am is the easy part. Admitting I'm scared is harder." Claire's voice was soft, now tinged with amusement. She felt lighter with that secret off her chest. If he was going to hold her through it, she wasn't in any hurry to let go.

"I'm an evolved human. Kind of like a Meta, but most of us were born with our powers except for those who were given that formula I told you about at Jitters. We all have abilities. Powers, I guess." It had never felt like a power to her, so she rarely referred to it as such. "Mine is that I heal. They call it rapid cell regeneration. Up until that Meta, I thought I was immune to any sort of toxin or drug. Heck, I can't even get drunk."

She paused, giggling nervously. "Sorry... the wine is still really nice."

[feelthelightning]

He tucked her in close and held her tight. Barry tipped his head so his temple was rested against her head as he listened to her. "He's... a nuisance." Barry laughed softly. "My last two relationships ended because I couldn't stand to see them in danger. Maybe he thought a healing ability would sway me after finding out you'd been attacked." It was almost scary how well Snart knew him. But profiling was something Leonard did exceptionally well. "I'm dangerous to be around."

"It's always hard to admit when we're scared. But everyone gets scared and I can definitely see how that would be terrifying when you've found yourself invulnerable up until then." He pressed a soft kiss to the side of her head.

"All the powers here are new. None of the Metas were born with them. But don't worry about the wine. Hypermetabolism does that. The flavour should compliment dinner, that was the main reason I brought it."

[infinite1ups]

"That makes two of us, though things had calmed down for me quite a lot before I moved here." Maybe that was because she'd been on the run for so long. She hadn't had much in the way of a permanent residence since the Ferris wheel jump. Sure, she'd stay somewhere a few months at most, in a barebones apartment or going from motel to motel, but she didn't let herself settle down.

Claire felt herself relaxing even more as he held her. He did say he wanted to tell her dad she'd be safe with him. Somehow, she felt like she would be. As safe as someone like her could manage, anyway. Certainly better than being on her own.

No one else came to mind, either, when she tried to think of someone who made her feel the way Barry did. The giddy rush she felt with him hadn't happened for quite a while. She thought she might turn into a puddle when he kissed her head, and she didn't realize until now that it was a feeling she'd sorely missed. For so long she'd been preparing to just be alone. Maybe she didn't have to be.

"My healing manifested about... ten years ago?" It was always a guessing game; that time in her life became a blur not long after she first noticed herself healing. "I just wanted to get prepped for Homecoming, then suddenly I'm a freak show and my life and everyone I care about are in danger. Talk about worst nightmares in high school."

She could laugh about it now, thanks to the passage of time and having grown up considerably since then. "I don't think of myself as a freak show anymore, but at the time, I was afraid I'd get kicked off the cheerleading squad and my social life as I knew it would end. Things you worry about when you're sixteen, I guess."

What did have to end, for the moment, was snuggle time. Claire jumped a little as the oven timer went off, then broke away with a sheepish grin. "That damn thing startles me every time," she complained, but her tone was more affectionate than truly annoyed. "C'mon, the second-best cure for talking about a bunch of serious and sad stuff is pizza." She grabbed her glass of wine and led the way back to the kitchen.

[feelthelightning]

Fortunately his powers hadn't come about until after he'd graduated college. So he didn't have to worry about getting kicked off any teams or anything with superspeed. Even if he wasn't using it, you just knew he'd be accused of it if he was at all successful.

"Hey, you're not a freak show." Barry objected then jumped right along with her when the timer went off. He let her go as she moved to get up, then snagged his glass as well, following her back into the kitchen. Now he was in the awkward position of, should he tell her that he's the Flash or should he just let that go for now? She'd confided in him her secret and obviously Snart thought she was worth keeping around or he wouldn't have pressed that she keep him in the loop about her abilities.

"--after all, if you're a freak show, then so am I." The words left his mouth before he'd even made up his mind. "I'm a Meta."

[infinite1ups]

She'd just turned the timer off when Barry revealed a secret of his own. Amidst her surprise, she managed to get the pizza out of the oven without dropping it or burning herself. (She even used oven gloves!) It wasn't until she set the hot pan down on the stovetop that she turned to look at him. Safety first, and all.

"You-- really?" Maybe it wasn't that much of a surprise, Claire thought, given that he'd been talking about working with Metas so he was clearly familiar with them. And, that curious glow of lightning in his eyes. Leonard had been careful not to give it away. It wasn't his secret to tell, just like he'd said about her regeneration. He was right, of course Barry would understand. Surging past the mild shock, though, was a rush of affection. That kind of mutual trust was more than enough to make her realize she was well and truly falling in love.

It would take moment or two before their dinner cooled down enough to serve, so she stepped over to take his hand... only to realize she still had the oven mitts on. A giggle erupted before she could stop them as she pulled them off and rested her hand on Barry's forearm, her smile softening.

"I would've understood if you kept that to yourself a while longer. I wouldn't want you to feel like you had to, just 'cause I told you mine. But, I'm really glad you could trust me enough to tell me tonight," she told him with a content sigh. The hearteyes were on full display; she felt so full of joy that she could burst, even as her tone got a little more serious when she said, "I will never betray that trust."

[feelthelightning]

"I don't want to hide who I am from you." Barry knew it wouldn't be long before he either admitted straight up that he was the Flash or that she put the pieces together. But for the moment, he was content just to laugh with her when she reached out to take his hands with the mitts still on.

"I am falling for you, hard, Claire." He admitted. "I've done the whole keep it a secret thing and that doesn't work. I want us to work." He reached up and cupped the side of her face gently. "I didn't feel pressured to. I wanted to. When I'm running, I run the fastest when I'm running for someone I love. I know that probably doesn't make any sense to you right now, but it will. I can show you." Quite the opposite of Thawne who runs on hatred.

Her heart eyes weren't the only ones on full display. Barry was completely infatuated.

this took a turn, and i hope it doesn't mess up any plans you might have had! D:

[infinite1ups]

Running for someone I love made perfect sense to her, the moment he said it. Thawne had told her how he ran for hate, while The Flash ran for love. It was quite the bout of emotional whiplash, from all but melting at Barry's confession of love and his hand on her face, to all the pieces slotting together.

Those conversations came flooding back, about how much Eobard hated The Flash, and all the terrible things he'd done to The Flash... to Barry. It had been one thing to think about all of that in an abstract way, happening to someone she didn't know. Sure, she empathized, but not having both sides of the story and being thoroughly charmed by Eobard, she could empathize with him, too. Maybe there had been more to The Flash than she realized, the way Thawne told it, enough to give him the benefit of the doubt. But now, to think he'd done all that to someone who had shown her nothing but affection and a genuine desire to do good, it broke her heart.

Most of all, it broke her heart that she believed him so readily. There was an unsettling feeling in her chest, almost like she'd been infected with that toxin all over again. Claire's face went pale, her smile faltering. To keep this from Barry would be a betrayal of the very trust she had just sworn to never betray. She wouldn't do that - she couldn't.

"It makes sense," she said softly, sadly. It would have been easier, in this moment, to just say she was falling for him too and not address it, except that her face had already given her away. There was no avoiding it now, or ever. "I've heard something like that before. From--"

She took a deep breath, swallowing hard. "From a man I met here, just before we met. Eobard Thawne." Just saying his name made her shiver with the new context. "I see it now. He was talking about you."

It's fine! XD Just cuts the angst in much sooner.

[feelthelightning]

Claire's reaction wasn't quite what he'd expected. And slowly it became apparent why that was. The moment that name fell from her lips, Barry recoiled as if he'd been burned. He might as well have been. He had jumped into this romance with his everything he had, like he tended to do, and he never learned his lesson.

"Thawne put you up to this?" He couldn't hide the betrayal in his voice as he misread the situation entirely. The hurt that gripped him was almost suffocating. He'd already put a few steps of distance between them. "I... trusted you." Why was he finding himself saying that line an awful lot lately. To Thawne, to Harry, to Jay... and now to her. Was he that easy to betray? To manipulate?

"...is that his new game? Make me fall in love with you so you could do what? Teach me that I'll never be rid of him? That I'll never be happy? So I'll second guess every good thing that happens in my life and wonder if it just Thawne screwing with me again?" Clearly, Thawne had left some serious scars in Barry's psyche. And if he could see this breakdown right now, he'd be enjoying it. Though, he never would have used Claire like this simply because he'd actually been charmed by her.

oh my heart!

[infinite1ups]

The way he drew back from her was just about the closest Claire had come to physical pain in a long time. It took everything in her not to reach for him when he stepped away. She thought telling the truth was the right move, rather than letting it come out further down the line.

"What? No--" Her voice cracked, but she steeled herself and firmly shook her head. "No, I swear. I had no idea who you were when I met him, and he didn't mention your name. He doesn't know that I know you now. I wasn't going to tell him even before I put it all together."

Her love life wasn't really any of Thawne's business, regardless of who she was dating.

"There is no game; he didn't set me after you. Us meeting really was more or less a coincidence. Now that you say it, I can see how it would look that way. That hadn't even crossed my mind. I just wanted to be honest with you." If she really was doing this to hurt him, it would've made more sense if she waited longer to stick the proverbial knife in his back, surely he'd be able to see that.

Their partnership would have to end. Claire needed to find a way out, without telling Thawne exactly why. Maybe she could have kept the two sides separated if Barry hadn't been The Flash, but after putting it all together? There was no way. She felt disgusted, mostly with herself, but also with Thawne.

"We... did make an arrangement, but it had nothing to do with The Flash." She buried her face in her hands, sighing. "God, I was so stupid. Thawne told me what he is. I should have never agreed to work with him at all. He was manipulating me, telling me how smart I am and how we could work together to learn more about people like us. I have to get out of it. I'll tell him I can't do it."

The possibilities of how that conversation could go south were all terrifying. She did get the feeling that Thawne genuinely liked her, at least as much as he was capable of liking anyone, but she knew well enough to know that'd go straight out the window as soon as he found out she was involved with Barry. Her blood ran cold at the thought.

"If he finds out about us, he'll see it as a betrayal just like you are. I don't know what he'll do."

Poor babies <3

[feelthelightning]

Barry pulled himself back so he could think rationally as she explained. Thawne was patient and vindictive. Sure, if this had been his plan it would have gone on longer. But that didn't mean his pawn hadn't suddenly grown a conscience and confessed. Though, that didn't feel right. Claire felt genuine to him. But so had Thawne. Even after he found out Harrison Wells was the Reverse-Flash, there were still moments where Wells had been so genuine and kind to him that he forgot the man was an evil bastard. But that was Thawne himself.

"Thawne killed Harrison Wells and pretended to be him for fifteen years so he could watch me grow up and influence me. So I'd become the Flash. He travelled back in time to kill me as an eleven year old kid because he couldn't beat me in the future and when future me saved kid me, he murdered my mother instead, hoping that'd break me. Then he found out if the Flash never happens, neither does he, so he had to make me happen." Barry explained, failing to keep tears from his eyes. He stepped closer again, hesitantly, and reached out to touch her arm.

"You're not stupid. He's a master manipulator." Barry was pretty sure he knew what Thawne would do. He was dangerous and unstable. When he caught Cisco deducing who he really was, he'd killed him without hesitation. And he thought of Cisco as a son. "I won't let him hurt you." Barry promised. He was still emotionally raw after this discovery, but he wouldn't let Thawne hurt her over it.

"What kind of arrangement?"

[infinite1ups]

Thawne had told her some of it, but to hear Barry tell it now, with tears in his eyes... Claire felt herself getting a little misty-eyed, too. It was easy to think of the situation reversed, how she'd feel if someone she just fell in love with admitted to being friendly with Sylar, who'd murdered both of her biological parents and tormented her for years.

Barry's hand on her arm felt like a tether, drawing her back to Earth when she'd been spinning up and up, out of control. She was still on edge, but she didn't feel as much like she was going to burst into tears.

"He offered to help me learn more about myself, what I can do. How I can use it to help others," she explained, then winced at her own naivety. "I let him take blood samples. We were supposed to meet up for lunch soon to discuss the results of his testing. Thank goodness I haven't given him my address."

The weight of Barry's promise caught up to her. She wasn't as worried about herself, as usual. But it filled her with dread to think of what he might do to Barry. Her hand found his again, and held on gently, in case he wanted to pull away. Every fiber of her being hoped that he wouldn't.

"I'm sorry, I really am. I meant it when I said I won't betray your trust." Another deep breath, because what she was about to say was hard. "I won't let him use me to get to you. I'd leave town before it came to that, my friends could help me disappear. It's the last thing I want, but... if that's what it takes."

[feelthelightning]

Barry didn't pull away, but he was also still on edge. He was always on a knifepoint when Thawne was mentioned. She didn't seem surprised by any of that and it left him wondering just what Thawne told her. At the very least, the time travel aspect made people balk. She did say Thawne told her what he was, but he just assumed that mean he talked about Metas.

"My father spent fifteen years of my life in prison for a murder Thawne committed. He lost his wife, his son, and his freedom that day. No one would believe me when I said my dad didn't do it. That I saw a storm of red and yellow lightning in my house and a man in yellow killed my mom. Then when the particle accelerator exploded and I became The Flash, he saved my life and taught me to use my powers. He helped me save lives. He risked his own life for mine time and time again. I saw him as family. Thawne is good at making you believe what he wants you to believe."

Barry was still tearing up. He lost his father shortly after finally proving him innocent, so a lot of these wounds were still very raw. Zoom killed Henry Allen in front of Barry in his childhood home where his mother was killed by Thawne. "If you want help with your powers, Harry and Caitlin are brilliant. Harry's smarter than Thawne ever was and Cait is a geneticist. You don't have to meet him for the results. They both handle all my bloodwork. They're who cured me of the chameleon's venom. Harry reverse engineered Thawne's time travel and implemented his tachyon research to make me faster. He even improved on Thawne's design to make it compact and discrete. You don't need Thawne." Barry wanted desperately for her to agree. He'd fallen for her so hard and he wanted to recover what they had. He also knew he'd have to keep an eye out for Thawne if he was somehow back yet again.

He doubted trying to hide from Thawne would do much good if he found out. The man was obsessive. And when he set his mind to something he usually came up with a way to at least cause enough damage to be a problem, even if he was stopped. The only way they'd stopped him the first time was Eddie Thawne, Iris' fiancee killed himself before Thawne could win to erase Eobard from the timeline. And yet, he kept coming back as timeline remnants.

[infinite1ups]

Much like she hadn't balked when Thawne talked about time travel due to her own experience with it, but Barry couldn't have known that. She was far more horrified about hearing his perspective on things that Thawne had told her.

Sure, he was a master manipulator, but she had been embarrassingly naive. So easily charmed by a few easy compliments and simply by treating her as his equal. What else could he have convinced her to agree to, with just a little more prodding?

"I won't," she vowed, choked up now. "I won't see him again, I don't even want to talk to him." Barry was right. "I don't need him."

The one she needed was standing right in front of her. She could walk away from Eobard Thawne and not feel much more than regret. But losing Barry would devastate her.

"But you, Barry. I need you." She took a chance, stepping closer. "I'm sorry I hurt you, that you're having to relive all these horrible things. You put your trust in me, you give your love so freely, and I intend to be worthy of it. That's why I told you now."

No matter what happened, she wouldn't regret being honest. "I have my own Eobard Thawne. Well, had. He's not after me anymore. But my point is, I know how you feel. Sylar killed both of my biological parents and he terrorized me for years." And now, Peter was being friendly with Sylar, making the same mistake she had with Thawne. And, for largely the same reason: empathy.

"The partnership is off, as far as I'm concerned. He has my number, so tomorrow I'll be changing it."